<!DOCTYPE html>
<html>
<head>
<meta charset="UTF-8">
<title>I wanna give you my love by VeretianStarburst</title>
<style type="text/css">

body { background-color: #ffffff; }
.CI {
text-align:center;
margin-top:0px;
margin-bottom:0px;
padding:0px;
}
.center   {text-align: center;}
.cover    {text-align: center;}
.full     {width: 100%; }
.quarter  {width: 25%; }
.smcap    {font-variant: small-caps;}
.u        {text-decoration: underline;}
.bold     {font-weight: bold;}
</style>
</head>
<body>
<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24491407">I wanna give you my love</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/VeretianStarburst/pseuds/VeretianStarburst'>VeretianStarburst</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Captive Prince - C. S. Pacat</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Arranged Marriage, Blow Jobs, Cheating, Consent Issues, Emotional Sex, Flirting, M/M, Sneaking Around</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-06-01</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-08-25</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-04 04:42:46</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>6</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>12,591</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24491407</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/VeretianStarburst/pseuds/VeretianStarburst</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>King Damianos of Akielos is married and Prince Laurent of Vere is betrothed, but that doesn’t stop them from pursuing each other.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Damen/Laurent (Captive Prince)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>64</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>200</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Title is lyrics from the song “Is It Love?” by iiO.</p>
<p>I'm gonna say this now that, yes, it is wrong for Damen and Laurent to be going after each other in this fic. It will definitely get angsty later, so if you're looking for a fic with a happy ending for our beloved main characters, this isn't it. Sorry!</p>
<p>This whole fic will be self-beta'd. Apologies for any mistakes.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Laurent picked up a sweetmeat from the gilded plate in front of him, mumbling a thank you to the servant when a goblet of cold water was poured for him. He wished his voice sounded as authoritative as his brother's, but having a voice that had not yet broken did not help. His legs dangled from the chair, swinging back and forth, as he watched the servant pour red wine into a second goblet.</p>
<p>Laurent's eyes were drawn to the wooden double doors when they opened. Auguste strolled in, waving a dismissive hand to the servant, who silently left, closing the doors on their way out.</p>
<p>“Sorry for keeping you waiting,” said Auguste, walking over to Laurent to kiss his forehead. He lifted Laurent's hand, the one holding the sweetmeat, and took a bite. He laughed as Laurent pushed him away with a pout.</p>
<p>“A King does not need to apologise.” Laurent took another bite and chewed slowly. He swallowed and said, “How was the Council meeting this morning?”</p>
<p>Auguste made his way to the other side of the circular table and sat down, picking up the goblet of wine. “I'll spare you the boredom.” He took a sip and lowered the goblet back to the table. “The whole time I was thinking about how nice the weather is today. Would you like to go for a ride?”</p>
<p>Laurent smiled and nodded eagerly. He finished his food and dipped his fingers in the golden shallow bowl of water to clean them. He accepted the linen napkin Auguste offered him and dried his hands.</p>
<p>They took their usual path on the outskirts of the city. Laurent heard the hooves from two horses behind them, keeping their distance. He could count on one hand the amount of times he had gone for a ride without guards trailing them. He preferred to spend time with his brother alone, just the two of them, but Laurent knew how important it was for a King to be protected.</p>
<p>They sat together under the shade of a tree with their backs against the trunk as the horses drank from the nearby river. Laurent lifted his knees and rested a book on his thighs. He glanced at his brother, who had closed his eyes with a relaxed expression on his face, and smiled, looking back down at the book as he opened it to the first page.</p>
<p>“Read to me?” said Auguste.</p>
<p>“It's an old story about magic and dragons. You wouldn't like it,” said Laurent. He turned his head to look at his brother.</p>
<p>Auguste's eyes were still closed as he said, “But you do, so I would like to hear it.”</p>
<p>Laurent flushed and he nodded his head, which felt like a silly thing to do since Auguste could not see him. He looked back down at the page and started reading out loud. Every so often Auguste would hum or laugh at something that had happened in the story.</p>
<p>After three chapters, they were interrupted by footsteps walking along the grass towards them. It was Jord, someone that Laurent liked a lot. He knew Jord was one of the most loyal people there was in the King's Guard.</p>
<p>“Your Majesty. Your Highness,” said Jord, bowing his head respectfully. “We should head back before it becomes too dark.”</p>
<p>Laurent agreed and closed the book, keeping a mental note of which page he was up to.</p>
<p>“Jord,” said Auguste, opening his eyes to look up at the man. He was using a tone which indicated he was pretending to be stern. “We've talked about this. You don't need to be so formal when it's just us.”</p>
<p>“It's a tough habit to break, I'm afraid,” said Jord, extending a hand.</p>
<p>Auguste laughed as he grabbed Jord's hand and let himself be pulled up to his feet. The gesture was something that never would have happened with his Father, the late King Aleron. In many ways, Laurent's brother and Father were two very different Kings.</p>
<p>It was no secret that Laurent hero worshipped his brother. He admired everything about Auguste, from his charisma to his swordplay. Auguste was a born leader, and the people of Vere loved him. Laurent saw first hand how exhausting being King was, yet Auguste still made time to talk to his people with a bright smile on his face.</p>
<p>By the time they rode back to the palace, the table in the dining hall had already been prepared for dinner. Laurent took his place to the right of the head of the table, which was rightfully reserved for the King. Tonight they were dining with the councilmen.</p>
<p>Laurent ate his food silently, listening to the conversations around him. He was too young to fully understand most of the topics. Talk about taxes had confused him the most, but he wanted to learn eventually. He pushed the last piece of meat around the plate with his fork as the outrageous price of cloth was brought up.</p>
<p>Servants were moving around the room, clearing empty dishes from the table and refilling cups. A cool breeze drifted in through the open windows. Spring was right around the corner, which meant Laurent's thirteenth birthday was coming up.</p>
<p>Laurent tried to keep up with the conversations but closed his mouth once the men had started to reminisce the days before he was even born.</p>
<p>Dessert was brought out on silver platters. By the time Laurent finished his slice of cake, two of the councilmen had already retired for the night. He set his fork down and wiped his mouth on an embroidered napkin. He straightened his posture and let his hands rest in his lap, turning his head towards Auguste when he heard his name being called.</p>
<p>“Your birthday is approaching,” said Auguste. “Almost thirteen whole years since you came into this world.” Auguste sighed sadly. “My baby brother is growing up too quickly.”</p>
<p>Laurent smiled fondly.</p>
<p>“I will need to start making preparations soon,” said Auguste. “There will be a banquet with many guests.”</p>
<p>“I'm looking forward to it,” said Laurent. He really was, despite how daunting the idea was that he was going to be the centre of attention. Which sounded ridiculous, because he was royalty, and eyes would always be on him. He should be used to being in the spotlight by now.</p>
<p>“So am I,” said Auguste with a smile. But there was something almost sad about the way he was smiling now. Bittersweet, even. It was not Auguste's usual carefree smile, Laurent could see that clearly.</p>
<p>-</p>
<p>Laurent walked towards the red cushioned windowsill and sat down. He arranged his legs so that it looked like he was sitting side saddle. It was the biggest window in the library and provided one of the best views of the gardens outside. Laurent turned his head enough to stare through the window as he sat there. Spring was beginning, and the flowers were starting to bloom.</p>
<p>Ever since he was old enough to read, the library had been Laurent's favourite spot in the palace. He didn't always read whenever he came there, because sometimes it was nice to just sit and think. He loved the quiet and peaceful atmosphere of the room.</p>
<p>His guard for the morning, Lazar, was casually leaning his back against the wall beside Laurent, arms crossed over his chest. “Seems rather boring to sit here all day,” said Lazar, groaning. “Does the little prince really have nothing better to do?”</p>
<p>Laurent continued looking out the window, but he could feel Lazar's eyes on him. He liked him. Lazar wasn't afraid to speak his mind, within reason of course, and was also one of the most loyal guards, alongside Jord.</p>
<p>Before Laurent could reply, he turned his head at the sound of the door creaking open. A servant walked into the library and towards them. Laurent could see from his peripheral vision that Lazar had taken one step away from the wall and stood at attention.</p>
<p>“Your Highness,” said the servant, a young boy. He bowed his head. “The Council have asked for you to be in attendance.”</p>
<p>Laurent slowly stood up, a little wary. His mind was racing with a hundred reasons, most of them bad, for why he would be called upon in the middle of a Council meeting. It had never happened before. He looked at Lazar, who shrugged, and they made their way out of the library.</p>
<p>They walked down the multiple hallways that lead to the throne room. Laurent's heart was pounding the whole time. He was worried and unsure of what to expect. When they turned the last corner he saw that Jord was one of the two guards at the door.</p>
<p>“Is it bad?” said Laurent.</p>
<p>“Best not to keep them waiting, Your Highness,” said Jord before he pushed the door open.</p>
<p>That did not help settle Laurent's nerves. He walked past Jord and into the room. He was greeted by the sight of Auguste, sitting on his throne and looking as kingly as ever. Blue banners with their signature starburst were hanging from the wall behind him. Standing in a line in front of Auguste was the Council. The councilmen all turned on the spot to face Laurent.</p>
<p>Laurent suddenly felt small, standing near the door by himself as everyone focused their attention on him. He held his hands behind his back and stood still, waiting as patiently as he could.</p>
<p>“Thank you for coming, Laurent,” said Auguste. The expression on his face was sombre. “I apologise if we have disrupted your morning. I will get straight to the point. The Council believe that a marriage between yourself and Prince Torveld will help strengthen our alliance with Patras.”</p>
<p>Laurent tensed, his heart thumping.</p>
<p>“Traditionally, Prince Torveld would start courting you as soon as you turn thirteen,” Auguste said. “But I refuse to allow it until you are of age. When you turn eighteen, Prince Torveld will visit once every two months over the course of a year to court you.”</p>
<p>“Which means you will marry him when you are nineteen,” said Councillor Jeurre.</p>
<p>Laurent's heart was beating impossibly fast. It was a lot of information to take in all at once. He opened his mouth, closed it. What was he supposed to say? All of the arrangements had clearly been made. The Council would not hear his protests if he were to make them.</p>
<p>“I wish to speak to my brother alone,” said Auguste.</p>
<p>The councilmen took their leave, walking out of the room one by one. The door closed, and it was now the two of them. Auguste rose from the throne and descended the three steps of the dais. Laurent let his hands fall to his sides and clenched them into fists. He could feel tears prickling his eyes.</p>
<p>“I have always tried to act like a brother first and a King second,” said Auguste. His voice was quiet, saddened. When he took a step forward, Laurent took an involuntary step backwards. “You know that I love you more than anything, Laurent. This decision was not easy for me to accept either.”</p>
<p>Deep down, Laurent always knew he would be used this way. He just didn't like to think about it, or believe it would actually happen. To be forced into a loveless marriage solely for political reasons was not the kind of life Laurent wanted. He suddenly understood why Auguste had looked sad that night when Laurent's birthday was brought up.</p>
<p>“I don't want to do this,” said Laurent, his voice low. He watched as Auguste walked towards him with hurried steps, his boots clacking against the tiled floor.</p>
<p>“I know that this is hard for you,” said Auguste, lifting a hand to gently wipe the tears from Laurent's face. When had they fallen? “But Prince Torveld is a kind man, and he will treat you with all of the respect you deserve.”</p>
<p>“I didn't get any say in this,” Laurent said, sounding almost broken. He felt himself start to tremble. Whether it was from anger or sadness, he could not tell. He pulled his arm away when Auguste tried to hold his hand.</p>
<p>Auguste's hand froze in the air. “Laurent—”</p>
<p>“I want to be alone,” said Laurent. He turned and headed for the door without a glance back. He let it slam shut as he walked down the hallway, leaving Auguste behind.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Thanks for reading!</p>
<p>Next chapter will take place after a timeskip to Damen and Laurent meeting for the first time.</p>
<p>You can find me over on <a href="https://veretianstarburst.tumblr.com/">tumblr</a>!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Thank you for all the kudos and comments so far! I'm really happy that people are already liking this fic :)</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Laurent stood beside Auguste at the top of the stairs that lead to the palace with the Veretian Council behind them. They watched the Akielons arrive in perfect formation through the gates with their red banners flapping in the wind. A crowd of courtiers was beginning to gather as the men dismounted their horses.</p><p>King Damianos of Akielos was indeed an attractive man, Laurent could not deny that. His eyes were instantly drawn to every inch of skin that was on display, eventually landing on the muscled biceps. Maybe chitons weren't such a bad article of clothing after all.</p><p>Laurent had long ago accepted his fate of being betrothed. His courtship with Prince Torveld had started last month, when he turned eighteen. The single sapphire jewel that dangled from his ear had been the first gift he received. It was a constant reminder that he belonged to someone he didn't choose, and he hated it, but he would play his part to help the alliance.</p><p>When Auguste began to descend the stairs, Laurent followed until they reached the bottom. Laurent could hear murmurs from the courtiers around them, both male and female, commenting on how handsome the King of Akielos was. They weren't wrong in the slightest.</p><p>“Our brother of Akielos,” said Auguste, smiling.</p><p>“Our brother of Vere,” said Damianos, clapping his hand on Auguste's shoulder. Laurent would have loved to turn around to see the councilmen's reaction to such a gesture between kings. “Thank you for welcoming us into your home.”</p><p>“It is long overdue.” Auguste raised his hand, palm up, in the direction of Laurent as he said, “May I introduce my brother, Prince Laurent of Vere.”</p><p>“It's nice to finally make your acquaintance, Damianos,” said Laurent, bowing his head.</p><p>“Please, call me Damen.” His eyes roamed Laurent's face, eventually landing on the earring. “I see that talk of your beauty has not been exaggerated. Prince Torveld is a very lucky man.” He smiled sheepishly when Auguste cleared his throat.</p><p>Laurent felt his cheeks heat up. “I'm sure you're tired after such a long travel,” he said, avoiding Damen's gaze.</p><p>“Come,” Auguste said. “You'll be shown to your rooms so you can rest before the feast tonight.”</p><p>-</p><p>Laurent slowly walked along the tall floor to ceiling shelves that lined the wall, his fingers brushing over the spines of the books. He had spent the afternoon in the library, after the Akielon delegation had settled into their rooms. There was still some time left to waste before the feast began.</p><p>Picking a book at random, he went to his favourite window and sat on the cushioned seat of it, one leg crossed over the other. Beside him was his circlet, which he had taken off his head the second he entered the library. He really only needed to wear it in front of guests, but the library so far had been empty of any Akielons.</p><p>Closing his eyes, Laurent placed the book in his lap and tapped his fingers on the cover to the rhythm of a melody his Mother used to hum to him when he was a child. The door to the library suddenly opened. Laurent paused, his fingertips hovering over the book as he opened his eyes.</p><p>“I was told I could find you here.”</p><p>“Damianos,” Laurent said.</p><p>“I'd be happy if you used my small name.”</p><p>Laurent blinked, staring at the other man. “Damen,” he said eventually, uncrossing his leg and placing the book beside him as Damen walked over to him. He stood up from the sill. Damen was taller, and so Laurent had to slightly tilt his head back to make proper eye contact. “I hope you rested well.”</p><p>“It was lonely sleeping without my wife by my side, I must admit,” said Damen.</p><p>“I heard,” said Laurent, “that last year Queen Jokaste gave birth to twins, a boy and a girl. Congratulations.”</p><p>It was, after all, the reason why Damen was in Vere. His daughter would be marrying Auguste's second son, when they were of age, to help strengthen the alliance between Vere and Akielos. Both Fathers of the children needed to sign the agreement before the betrothal was official.</p><p>“Thank you,” said Damen. “I actually have something to ask you.”</p><p>“I'm listening,” Laurent said.</p><p>“Was it…” Damen rubbed his hand against the back of his neck as he spoke. “How did you handle being told that you were to be married off?” He lowered his hand. “I was lucky enough to choose Jokaste to marry, but my daughter... I'm worried she will resent and hate me for doing this.”</p><p>Laurent thought back to the day in the throne room. He remembered how he had walked away and spent days in his rooms, refusing to come out. “I was twelve, close to thirteen when Auguste told me. I felt hurt, more than anything, that my life had basically been signed away.” He turned, picking up the circlet and setting it atop his head. “But a political marriage is often the fate of those born into royalty. It took me a while to accept that.” He faced Damen. “I'm sure your daughter and my nephew will get along fine.”</p><p>Damen nodded. “I see, thank you.” He looked around the room before his eyes landed on Laurent. “You like to read?”</p><p>“I do,” said Laurent. “But I'm afraid I haven't had the chance to read anything Akielon. Most of the books here are written in Veretian.” He raised his hand and tucked the stranded hair behind his ear, his fingers briefly touching the earring. “Prince Torveld is bringing Patran books for me when he visits next month.”</p><p>“I'll send you some popular Akielon poetry.”</p><p>Laurent raised an eyebrow, looking a little skeptical. “Poetry?” His eyes raked up and down Damen's toned body. “You don't seem the type to read, let alone poetry.” he said, almost in disbelief.</p><p>Damen laughed. “Jokaste insists that our children are read to before bed.”</p><p>Laurent hummed. He stared out the window as he said, “Is it true that your Mother was the one to plant the gardens at the summer palace?” He looked back at Damen, who nodded. “Perhaps you'll appreciate the gardens here.”</p><p>“Then I must insist we take a walk through them sometime,” said Damen.</p><p>They both turned at the sound of the door opening. A servant had come to announce that the feast was starting. Laurent knew he was expected to at least make an appearance at it and so he walked, side by side with Damen, into the great dining hall.</p><p>-</p><p>Shortly before Laurent's fourteenth birthday, Auguste had married a Lady of the Kemptian court in order to gain back Kempt's support. Vere had lost it after Queen Hennike passed away when Laurent was young. They had two healthy sons, who were currently visiting Kempt with their Mother.</p><p>“They left for Kempt two months ago,” Auguste said to Damen. “They'll be returning next year, in time for Laurent's wedding.”</p><p>Laurent remained quiet, hoping the stiffness that he felt wasn't visibly noticeable. He may have accepted his arranged marriage, but talking about the wedding day sometimes made him feel uneasy. Laurent would have to consummate a marriage with a man he could not see himself ever loving romantically. He tried not to think about it as he took a slow sip of water and continued listening.</p><p>“I couldn't imagine being away from my wife and children for that long,” said Damen.</p><p>“I miss them dearly, but it is important for my sons to see where their Mother came from,” said Auguste.</p><p>The topic soon changed to sports, which was something Laurent wasn't particularly interested in. Laurent sat there and watched how engrossed Auguste and Damen were in their conversation. It amazed him how easily the two were already getting along. It was as if they had known each other since childhood.</p><p>Laurent chose that moment to excuse himself from the table. If his departure was acknowledged, he didn't know, because he had gone straight to the wide balcony. Placing his hands on top of the stone balustrade, he took a deep breath, enjoying the cool air of the night.</p><p>Laurent had been outside for fifteen minutes before he heard footsteps coming closer from behind. He didn't flinch as he felt the presence of a body standing next to him, just continued staring forward.</p><p>“So this is where you've been,” Damen said, leaning his elbow on the balustrade, his pose relaxed against it as he faced Laurent.</p><p>“My apologies for disappearing suddenly. I found myself needing fresh air,” said Laurent, trying to ignore the fact that they were standing a little too close. He could feel Damen's eyes on him. “You and Auguste seem to be getting along well.”</p><p>“You and I aren't?”</p><p>“Hmm.” He paused, pretending to be lost in thought. Finally, he said, “Would it bother you if we weren't?” He turned his body to mimic Damen's position, their eyes meeting.</p><p>“Extremely,” said Damen.</p><p>Laurent laughed quietly. “Then I have a feeling you and I will be seeing a lot of each other during these next two weeks that you're here.”</p><p>“I'm not against that.”</p><p>“So you wouldn't mind joining me for breakfast tomorrow,” Laurent said, smiling as he pushed himself away from the railing. “Have a good night, Damen,” he said before he turned, leaving the balcony to retire for the night.</p><p>-</p><p>Laurent was sitting, one legged crossed over the other, across from Damen at the wooden table in a secluded section of the gardens. The sky was blue and clear with not a cloud in it. Leaves from the trees around them were rustling from the light wind. The flowers were in full bloom, their scent wafting through the early morning air.</p><p>“You don't seem to have slept well,” Laurent said, picking up a peach from the platter of mixed fruit. He took a bite as he looked at Damen.</p><p>“It was a restless night,” said Damen. “Sleeping alone is harder than I remember it being.”</p><p>Laurent gave him a pitying smile. “I'm sure there are plenty of people willing to share their pet with the King of Akielos.”</p><p>“I'm not sure it's a pet that I want.”</p><p>Laurent's hand, which was holding the peach, was halfway to his mouth when he paused. His eyes quickly looked towards Jord and Lazar, who were both standing a short distance away from them. If they had overheard, they showed no sign of it. Laurent's heart was pounding as he finally bit into the fruit, his eyes drifting back to Damen as he chewed slowly.</p><p>Swallowing, Laurent said, “And, being King, I suppose you always get what you want?” He felt the flush form on his cheeks when Damen simply gave him a sly smile.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>It's honestly a miracle I didn't end this chapter with them sleeping together, cause it was so tempting 😅</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Chapter 3</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The sound of swords clashing echoed throughout the indoor training arena. Laurent stood on the sideline as he watched Damen and Auguste spar. Both were extremely talented swordsmen. Auguste had been practicing since he was young enough to pick up a sword, and learned everything he knew from Vere's best swordmaster. If Damen and Auguste had to meet on a battlefield, in a real match, he was not sure which one would win.</p>
<p>Two Kings sparring had obviously attracted many spectators. When Damen had made the suggestion, Auguste had accepted with a grin as he unlaced his brocade jacket before shrugging it off to pass to a servant. And because this was Vere, he had left his white undershirt on.</p>
<p>Damen, on the other hand, had opted for unpinning his chiton. The only reason it had not fallen off completely was because a belt was tied around his waist.</p>
<p>Laurent was having a hard time focusing on anything other than Damen's straining muscles whenever he swung his sword. Sweat was beginning to form on his bare chest, and for a split moment Laurent was picturing what it would feel like to have Damen on top of him like that, pressing him against the mattress as he–</p>
<p>“I've never seen you so interested in swordplay,” Lazar said, standing beside Laurent.</p>
<p>Laurent said nothing, watching as the spar finally came to an end. Damen slung an arm around Auguste's shoulders as they laughed. Words were exchanged between the two of them, although Laurent was too far to clearly hear what was being said.</p>
<p>Auguste spoke once more before stepping away to pull his jacket on, keeping still as a servant worked on doing up the laces. Meanwhile, Damen was working on pinning his chiton back together. It took a great deal of effort for Laurent to avert his eyes from the display when he noticed Auguste walking towards him.</p>
<p>“I hope you'll be joining Damen and I for lunch today,” said Auguste, smiling. “It's a beautiful day to eat in the gardens, don't you think?”</p>
<p>Laurent nodded with a smile of his own.</p>
<p>“I need to freshen up beforehand. We'll meet there in an hour,” he said, kissing Laurent's forehead before leaving.</p>
<p>When Laurent looked back at Damen, he was already engaged in a conversation with three Veretian courtiers. A pet was clinging to the arm of his master, his eyes intense on Damen, obviously trying to get his attention.</p>
<p>
  <em>“I'm not sure it's a pet that I want.”</em>
</p>
<p>Five days had passed since Damen had said those words, but Laurent still found himself thinking about it. Laurent knew, from gossip in the court, that he was exactly Damen's type. It was also painfully obvious by the way Damen looked at him. But nothing could ever happen between them, not while he was betrothed and Damen a married man with children.</p>
<p>Laurent turned and left the room, Lazar's footsteps not far behind. He made his way to the stable and ordered all the stable boys out as he walked in, leaving Lazar at the open entrance. He walked towards his white mare and stood still as he stroked her neck. The earring had been a courting gift, but Torveld had brought this particular horse along with him from Patras for Laurent's eighteenth birthday. He hadn't decided on a name for her yet.</p>
<p>Laurent wasn't sure how much time had passed before he heard movement coming from the entrance. There were very few people who could ignore his order to have the stable cleared. He turned his head, hand still on the mare, as he watched Damen approach.</p>
<p>“Gorgeous,” Damen said, raising his own hand to rest next to Laurent's.</p>
<p>“She is,” said Laurent. Standing this close, he could see Damen's damp hair and smell the scented oils that were used in the baths. He must have bathed before coming to the stable.</p>
<p>“I wasn't talking about the horse,” said Damen, his hand inching closer to Laurent's.</p>
<p>Their eyes locked as Damen's hand slid atop Laurent's. Laurent couldn't slow his pounding heart as Damen gently caressed his hand. He knew he had to stop this. There were many reasons why this shouldn't happen, but he liked the weight and warmth of Damen's hand on his own.</p>
<p>“Your Highness,” said Lazar. “Your brother will be expecting you soon.”</p>
<p>Laurent pulled his hand away as if it had been burned. It took him a moment to be able to tear his eyes away from Damen’s. He looked towards Lazar, who was still at the entrance with his back to them.</p>
<p>“Shall we?” Damen said, taking a step back as he lowered his hand with a smile.</p>
<p>Nodding, Laurent walked with him out of the stable. He kept his eyes forward as they headed for the gardens. Auguste was already sitting at the table, Jord standing not far behind him, when they arrived. Lazar walked over to Jord, the two making small talk as Laurent and Damen joined Auguste.</p>
<p>Birds chirped from the trees around them as they ate. Laurent was silent as he nibbled on bread, content with listening to Damen and Auguste talk about their sparring session. His mind was still thinking about the way Damen had touched his hand earlier.</p>
<p>“Unfortunately, swordplay has never interested Laurent, as much as I wanted to teach him when he was younger,” Auguste said with a sigh. He had his elbow on the table with his chin resting on the palm of his hand.</p>
<p>“Never? With time, I'm sure he'd excel at it,” said Damen.</p>
<p>“I think so too,” said Auguste.</p>
<p>Laurent gave a fake cough. “I am right here, you know,” he said.</p>
<p>Damen laughed. “So it's true? You've never wanted to learn how to use a sword?”</p>
<p>“No,” said Laurent, shaking his head. “I've never had the desire to learn.” He looked at the platter piled with pastries that he didn't recognise. “What are those?” he said, curiously.</p>
<p>“They're a traditional Akielon dessert,” said Damen. “Auguste had mentioned in letters that you have a bit of a sweet tooth, so I brought recipes for the cooks to make them for you.”</p>
<p>Laurent wondered what else had been said through letters. “Thank you,” he said, after a moment.</p>
<p>“They're quite good. You'll like them,” said Auguste, standing up. “I'm afraid I must take my leave now. Enjoy the rest of your afternoon.” He smiled. “I'll see you both at dinner tonight.” He left the gardens, Jord following behind.</p>
<p>Picking up a pastry between thumb and forefinger, Laurent took a small bite. Damen was watching for his reaction as he sipped wine from the goblet. Laurent took a second bite before he felt a hand on his clothed thigh. They were sitting beside each other, so the gesture would be covered by the tabletop if Lazar happened to look in their direction.</p>
<p>“Do you like it?” Damen said.</p>
<p>It was hard for Laurent to tell if Damen was referring to the food or the touch. He took another bite and swallowed. “I appreciate you bringing the recipes. These are good.”</p>
<p>Damen smiled. “I'm happy to hear that.” His hand squeezed lightly. “And this?” he said, his voice lowered.</p>
<p>The pastry fell from Laurent's fingers. He knew that the flush he felt would be visible on his face. He straightened his posture, cleaning his fingers in the bowl of water as he said, “Not even my betrothed has been this bold.” His voice was also low.</p>
<p>“Seems rather boring for you,” said Damen, squeezing Laurent's thigh once more before he removed his hand.</p>
<p>“Let's not waste the whole day sitting here,” Laurent said, after drying his fingers. “It's nice weather for a walk, wouldn't you agree?”</p>
<p>They spent half an hour walking through the gardens. Laurent was only half paying attention to whatever it was that Damen was saying. He was too busy trying to figure out what was happening between the two of them. Acting on any possible feelings would only hurt them both in the end. Laurent may not have chosen Torveld to spend the rest of his life with, but just thinking about doing anything with Damen was wrong.</p>
<p>-</p>
<p>The next morning, after breakfast, Laurent found himself standing in the throne room with Damen. Auguste and Damen had just finished signing the agreement for their children to wed when they came of age. When Auguste left, Laurent stayed behind with Damen to show him around the room.</p>
<p>“I don't think there's a single bare wall in this palace,” Damen said with a laugh. He walked towards the throne, standing at the bottom of the dais.</p>
<p>Laurent smiled. “Welcome to Vere,” he said, coming to stand beside Damen. They were both staring at the throne. “Is the throne room much different in Akielos?”</p>
<p>“Well, for one,” said Damen, “we can actually see the white marble walls in it. My red banners are quite a stark contrast against them, and the dais has five steps.”</p>
<p>Laurent nodded. He held back the instinct to jump in surprise when Damen's hand rested on the small of his back. Looking around, Laurent finally realised that they were alone. The guards were on the other side of the door. Laurent's heartbeat sped up as they both turned to face each other. Damen's hand was still on him.</p>
<p>“Prince Torveld would declare war against you if he knew about this,” said Laurent, his voice as steady as he could make it sound.</p>
<p>Damen smiled, pulling Laurent in closer. His other hand lifted to cup Laurent's cheek, his fingers brushing the sapphire earring in the process. Laurent was suddenly hit with the memory of standing in this very room when he was twelve, being told about his arranged marriage.</p>
<p>Laurent should have pulled away the moment their lips pressed together, but he didn't. His hands came up to rest on Damen's chest, as though he was fighting the urge to push him away.</p>
<p>“We shouldn't–” Laurent said, but cut himself off by leaning forward for another kiss. He wanted to know what it felt like to be with someone he chose, instead of somebody he was forced to be with.</p>
<p>But there could be no future for the two of them together, Laurent knew that, even as he kissed Damen for a third time. This would be something they could only enjoy for the next week, until Damen left to go back home to Akielos.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I hope this turned out okay, cause I lowkey struggled to write it 😓</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Chapter 4</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Laurent was pressed against the wall, his legs wrapped around Damen's waist. He held Damen's face in both hands, pulling him in for a kiss. He liked the feel of Damen's hands around his midsection, holding him in place as the kiss deepened.</p><p>They were in one corner of the library, a row of bookshelves to their left and right. Laurent had told the guards not to let anybody inside. If Auguste, being the only person not obliged to obey that order, had not already retired for the night, he would have feared the risk of his brother entering.</p><p>Since that day in the throne room, it had been extremely difficult to get any time to themselves, at least without giving away what they were doing. They still managed to make small touches and whisper sweet nothings to each other, but Laurent wanted to take things further than that. It was the night before Damen was due to leave Vere, and he wouldn't be back until next year to attend Laurent's wedding.</p><p>“I wish we could do this in a bed,” Damen said after they pulled away for air, their faces only inches apart.</p><p>Laurent hushed him, pulling Damen back in for another kiss. It would be too risky to ask for privacy in the bedroom, to simply walk in together. More than half the court would be gossiping about it the day after. The library seemed more plausible at least, because surely nobody would suspect that the King of Akielos and the Prince of Vere were being intimate in there.</p><p>Laurent tilted his head to let Damen kiss the side of his neck. He could feel the weight of the earring dangling from his ear as he wrapped his arms around Damen's shoulders. His chest suddenly felt tight, his breathing starting to quicken.</p><p>Damen pulled his head back with furrowed eyebrows. “Are you okay?” His face was full of concern as he searched Laurent's eyes.</p><p>“This isn't right,” said Laurent, his voice low. He closed his eyes and rested his forehead against Damen's, the two keeping still like that in the quietness of the room. Laurent unconsciously tightened his legs around Damen. “I'm expected to only be with Prince Torveld. I can't have you.”</p><p>“We can always stop,” said Damen.</p><p>“I don't want to stop,” said Laurent, but his voice sounded pained as he opened his eyes.</p><p>Akielon royalty could have another lover, which explained why Damen was more carefree about doing this, but it didn't work that way in Vere. Laurent being with anybody other than Torveld, especially during their courtship, was a big insult. Vere was at risk of losing Patras' support if they were discovered.</p><p>“Then let me make you feel good,” Damen said, raising a hand to run it through Laurent's soft hair, his other hand still on Laurent's waist. “Can I do that for you?”</p><p>Laurent gave a small nod, kissing Damen one more time before letting his feet touch the floor. He stood there and watched as Damen went to his knees, his eyes widening slightly when he realised what was about to happen.</p><p>“Is this okay?” said Damen.</p><p>“Yes,” said Laurent, laughing quietly as Damen fumbled with unlacing his pants. He gently pushed Damen's hands aside to do it himself.</p><p>Damen's mouth was on him the moment he was freed, causing Laurent to grab a fistful of Damen's dark curls atop his head. Laurent's other hand came to rest on Damen's right shoulder, his head tilting back against the wall. He gave a small gasp when Damen started to move his head, his toes curling inside of his boots.</p><p>Laurent was torn. He genuinely wanted to enjoy this, but the guilt that he felt was eating at him at the same time.</p><p>“You're very tense,” Damen said after pulling his head back, looking up. His hands were busy caressing Laurent's thighs.</p><p>“I've… never done this before,” said Laurent, keeping his eyes on the ceiling. It wasn't untrue. His sexual experience was practically nonexistent, since he refused to ever keep a pet. And it was a lot easier to say that, than to talk about his guilt. “Keep going. Please.”</p><p>Damen paused for a moment before his mouth was back on Laurent. Closing his eyes, Laurent let out a quiet moan. His hand gripped tighter in Damen's hair as he came, his face flushed and breathing ragged.</p><p>Damen's thumbs rubbed soothing circles against Laurent's thighs as Laurent tried to get his breathing back under control. His mind was still trying to comprehend the fact that the King of Akielos was on his knees to please him. Opening his eyes, Laurent looked down to lace up his pants.</p><p>“I want you to come with me to Akielos tomorrow,” said Damen, his thumbs still moving.</p><p>The smile that Laurent gave him was sad. “We both know that I can't do that. I wouldn't make it back here before Torveld arrives,” he said, watching as Damen stood up.</p><p>Laurent leaned forward against Damen's chest, welcoming the arms that wrapped around him. His own hands were by his sides, his eyes closed as they stood still like that, Laurent listening to the beat of Damen's heart in the stillness of the library.</p><p>After what seemed like an eternity, Laurent forced himself to finally pull away from Damen's comforting arms. It was getting late, and he knew that the Akielon delegation would be leaving at dawn.</p><p>“You need to rest,” said Laurent, walking along the row of books. “You have a long trip ahead of you tomorrow.” He could feel Damen's eyes on him as he grabbed a book. Walking back to Damen, Laurent handed it to him.</p><p>“What's this?” Damen said, raising an eyebrow.</p><p>“I believe people call it a book,” said Laurent, smiling when Damen laughed. “I used to read this to Auguste. I'm not sure if it's a story you'll be interested in, but it's one of my favourites, so I want you to have it.”</p><p>“I…” Damen stared down at the book, one hand running over the leather cover of it. It was in a condition that showed it had clearly been reread countless times. “Thank you,” said Damen, looking up at Laurent. “I was serious about wanting to send you Akielon poetry, you know.”</p><p>“I know,” said Laurent. “I'm excited to read it.” He leaned up to kiss Damen sweetly. He never wanted it to end, because it was potentially their last kiss, perhaps ever.</p><p>-</p><p>Laurent was standing in the middle of his bedroom as a servant laced up the back of his jacket. It was early morning, the sun shining in through the window above the bed. Laurent was idly picking at the lacing on the left sleeve of his arm when a knock came from the closed door.</p><p>“Laurent?” said Auguste. “Are you decent?”</p><p>“Yes,” said Laurent. “You can come in.”</p><p>The door opened, and Auguste walked into the room. Laurent could see a glimpse of Jord waiting in the antechamber. Typically all guards would wait out in the hallway, but very few were trusted enough to be allowed inside.</p><p>Auguste was holding a book in one hand as he walked up to Laurent. “This arrived for you,” said Auguste, holding out the book. “All the way from Akielos.”</p><p>Laurent stopped the excitement that he felt from showing on his face as he took the book from his brother. He touched the cover as he stared at it, much like how Damen had done in the library.</p><p>Since Damen left Vere, Laurent had been working on his Akielon whenever he had the chance. But being engaged to Torveld meant he had to prioritise practicing his Patran, which he still wasn't fluent in, but Torveld was always happy to help him learn new phrases.</p><p>“Is there a reason Damen sent you this now?” said Auguste, looking down at the book. “I could understand if it was a wedding gift, but that's still two months away.”</p><p>Laurent gave a nonchalant shrug. “Perhaps he noticed the lack of Akielon books here.” It took a great deal of effort not to smile from the happiness he was feeling. Laurent wondered if Damen had read the book he gave him, and if he had, did he like it?</p><p>The servant had tied up half of Laurent’s jacket before Auguste dismissed him. They bowed and left the room as Auguste walked around Laurent to finish the lacing with expert fingers. Laurent held the book in both hands against his chest, eager to start reading it.</p><p>“What are your plans with Torveld today?” said Auguste.</p><p>“We're taking a walk through the gardens before breakfast,” he said. “In the afternoon we're going for a ride.”</p><p>“Sounds like a nice day,” said Auguste.</p><p>“It does.” Laurent imagined doing those things with Damen, and instantly regretted it when his heart ached.</p><p>The end of the lace was tied up in a knot before Laurent could finally turn and walk towards his bed, placing the book on top of it. He wished that the day was already over so that he could start reading it. His fingers lingered on the cover before he moved to put on the earring. He reached for the ring, which had been another courting gift. The oval sapphire stone sparkled in the morning light.</p><p>“You still haven't told him that you don't like jewellery,” said Auguste.</p><p>“It would have been rude of me to reject his gifts, even more so if I were to say something now,” he said, reluctantly sliding the ring onto his finger. “Besides, he seems to enjoy adorning me like a pet.”</p><p>“That's not–” Auguste paused, coming to stand in front of Laurent. He lightly held Laurent's forearms with both hands, their eyes meeting. “Torveld would understand if you tell him you don't like something. That is the whole point of him courting you, so you get to know each other. He mentions it to me all the time that he's trying to make you happy.”</p><p>“If he truly cared about my happiness, he would call off the wedding.”</p><p>“You know that's not possible,” said Auguste, the pain clear in his voice.</p><p>“I should go,” said Laurent, forcing himself to look away. “He'll be expecting me soon.”</p><p>-</p><p>“I trust you slept well,” said Torveld, smiling.</p><p>“I did.” Laurent returned the smile. “I've been enjoying the books you brought for me, by the way. It's been very hard to put them down.” He rested his hand in the crook of Torveld's arm, making sure that the ring was on display.</p><p>“I'm pleased to hear that,” Torveld said as they entered the gardens, Lazar and Orlant following behind. “You'll love the library in Patras. I can't wait to show it to you.”</p><p>Laurent hummed. “Not much longer to wait now.”</p><p>The air was chilly as they walked, making polite small talk with passing courtiers. Laurent, patiently listening with a smile, let Torveld do the speaking whenever the topic of their wedding was brought up. It wasn't something he was particularly thrilled to talk about.</p><p>When they reached the secluded section, Laurent could see the table up ahead and was hit with the memory of Damen touching his thigh there. His hand slightly squeezed Torveld's arm.</p><p>“Is something the matter?” said Torveld, worry in his voice.</p><p>“Forgive me. I'm a little overwhelmed from all of the talk about the wedding,” he said, because he couldn't say <em>I'm thinking about how another man touched me here</em>. His grip loosened as they walked past the table.</p><p>“There is nothing to forgive,” said Torveld. “It will be nice once this is over, and we can finally settle down.”</p><p>“Yes, it will,” said Laurent, lying. “It must be exhausting for you to have to travel back and forth between Patras and Vere.”</p><p>“It is worth it, to see you,” said Torveld with a charming smile. “I've been enjoying your company.”</p><p>“You flatter me.” Laurent's smile was fake, but he was good at making it look real.</p><p>They followed the rest of the path through the gardens as Torveld spoke about the history of Patras, Laurent nodding along with feigned interest.</p><p>-</p><p>Laurent was relieved when he could finally retire for the night. He dismissed the servant after his jacket was unlaced and the garment taken off. The day had dragged on longer than he thought it would, and he was glad to finally be alone.</p><p>The book was still on the bed, in the same spot Laurent had put it that morning. He stared at it with a small smile as he took off the earring and ring. After putting the jewellery away, he picked up the book and walked over to the reclining couch.</p><p>Laurent had read half a dozen poems before he noticed, with a flush, that they were all about love.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Thank you for reading ❤</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Chapter 5</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Sorry it took so long to update ;_;</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Laurent was dreading the wedding. It was only one week away, and because it was taking place in Vere, it was going to be unnecessarily extravagant. He had not gone out of his way to be involved with the preparations or planning, which were mostly done by now. He had only spoken up or gave his opinion whenever he was asked for them.</p><p>Sitting across from Torveld, Laurent looked at the man that he would be leaving his home for. He didn't dislike the Prince of Patras. Torveld was very intelligent and knowledgeable about a lot of things, and a respectful and confident person, but Laurent did not love him.</p><p>He didn't even want to think about the wedding night.</p><p>They were sitting outside on the balcony with a chess board on the table between them. The chess set had been Torveld's final courting gift, and possibly one of Laurent's favourite out of the many things he was given.</p><p>“Auguste tells me that the Queen of Vere and her children will be returning from Kempt in the morning,” Torveld said, in Patran, moving his knight piece.</p><p>“Yes, it's very fortunate that I will be able to see them before departing for Patras with you after the wedding,” said Laurent, also in Patran, as he moved a piece of his own.</p><p>“Have you ever been to Kempt?”</p><p>Laurent shook his head. “My Mother passed before she was able to take me there.” He didn't have the desire to go after her death, and since he was never required to visit the country, even for political reasons, he didn't.</p><p>Laurent called over a waiting servant for a goblet of water as he said, “On a brighter note, I'm looking forward to my first time in Patras, since I'll be in enjoyable company.” He moved a piece. “However, it’s a shame that that company has yet to beat me in chess.” He looked up at Torveld with a smile. “Checkmate,” he said before taking a sip of water.</p><p>Torveld laughed as he leaned back in his chair. “I'm clearly no match for your brilliant mind.”</p><p>“Don't feel too bad,” Laurent said as he watched the servants clear the table. “Not many people have the honour to say they can beat me in chess.”</p><p>Plates of food and bowls of fruit were placed on the table, where the board had been just seconds ago. Laurent did not have much of an appetite that morning, but he set down the goblet on an empty spot on the table and slowly picked at the grapes.</p><p>“Your Patran has improved a lot,” said Torveld, breaking off a piece of bread.</p><p>“It must be odd for you to hear it with a Veretian accent,” said Laurent. They were still speaking in Patran.</p><p>“It sounds nice to me.”</p><p>Laurent wanted to roll his eyes.</p><p>Torveld left the balcony shortly after breakfast, apologising that he had other matters to attend to. Laurent stayed where he was, resting an elbow on the table with his chin on the palm of his hand.</p><p>The clouds were darkening and a chill was in the air, which meant that rain was most likely coming, but Laurent could not care less. Perhaps he could delay the wedding if he was bedridden from being sick. Sighing, he closed his eyes.</p><p>Laurent was tired. He didn't want to hear about the wedding anymore, or keep pretending that he was happy with an arranged marriage. The fact that he would be leaving Vere, his home, made him feel worse. He didn't know how he was going to say goodbye to Auguste without breaking down. On top of all that, he was trying to understand his feelings for Damen.</p><p>Laurent opened his eyes when he heard footsteps coming from the doorway on his right. Chin still on his hand, he turned his head slightly and watched as Auguste closed the double doors, leaving all of the guards on the other side. His eyes followed his brother's movements as Auguste took a few steps towards him at the table.</p><p>“You've hardly been eating lately, I've noticed,” said Auguste, looking down at the amount of food still on the table. His brows furrowed with concern when he looked at Laurent. “You look exhausted.” He frowned. “It hurts me to see you like this.”</p><p>Laurent had to physically bite his tongue to stop himself from saying something he would regret. Auguste was clearly looking forward to seeing his family return the next day, and Laurent didn't want to dampen that mood by talking about how miserable he was feeling.</p><p>“It's just because of nerves,” said Laurent, quieter than he wanted to sound. He lowered his arm and stood up. “You don't need to worry, I promise. I'll feel better after some sleep.” He tried to walk past Auguste, but was stopped by a hand on his upper arm. Gently, he was pulled into a hug.</p><p>“You know I'm always going to worry about you,” said Auguste, softly, as the first drops of light rain began to fall. “Go rest now. I'll have food sent to your rooms if you miss lunch or dinner.”</p><p>Laurent barely nodded as he pulled back, looking up at his brother. “Thank you. Not just for this, but for… everything. I know how much you've tried to make this betrothal easier for me.”</p><p>“Of course.” Auguste smiled, although there was sadness in his eyes, and they left the balcony together.</p><p>When he entered his rooms, Laurent worked on unlacing the front of his outer garment. It would have been a lot easier for a servant to do it for him, but Laurent wanted to be alone.</p><p>Removing the garment after some time, he draped it over a chair and picked up the Akielon book from the table on his way towards the bed. He laid on his side in the middle of the bed, under the soft blanket, and placed the book beside him on the mattress. He ran a finger down the spine of the book, sighing as he closed his eyes.</p><p>-</p><p>Laurent awoke the following day, at dawn, to the sounds of people moving around and talking outside in the courtyard. He yawned, blinking away the sleep, surprised that he had slept for that long. He stared at the book, still in the same spot, his heart pounding at the thought of being able to see Damen whenever the Akielon delegation arrives.</p><p>He threw back the blanket and left the bed to get ready for the day ahead.</p><p>When Laurent entered the courtyard, he leaned his shoulder against a stone pillar as he watched servants remove baggage from a wooden carriage. There was a second carriage beside it, where Auguste was offering his hand to the Queen as she stepped out of it. They both had joyful smiles as they embraced each other closely. </p><p>The sight brought a smile to Laurent's face. It was easy for anyone to see that their love for one another was genuine.</p><p>When they pulled away, Auguste helped his sons, aged four and five, out of the carriage as the Queen began to walk towards Laurent. She had to lift her green skirts to avoid the hemline from dragging along the ground. Her light brown hair was braided in the Veretian style and rested over one shoulder. Laurent moved away from the pillar and met her halfway.</p><p>“Welcome back,” Laurent said, holding her hand and kissing the top of it. “It's good to see you again.” He was not lying.</p><p>“We've missed you all very much,” she said, her voice as soothing as always. When Laurent released her hand, she used it to cup the side of his face. “How have you been?”</p><p>“I…” Laurent glanced at his brother, who was kneeling in front of his youngest son to look at the wooden toy he was being shown. They were too far away to be able to hear the conversation. “I'm fine,” he said, looking back at her.</p><p>“I know you're smart enough to know I don't believe that,” she said, brushing back his hair with her thumb. “It's a very hard thing, to have to leave your home country, especially because of an arranged marriage.” She lowered her hand from his face.</p><p>Laurent gave her a half smile. “The things we do for alliances.”</p><p>“This is new,” she said, lifting his hand with both of hers to inspect the ring. “Courting gift?” When Laurent nodded, she clicked her tongue and let go of his hand.</p><p>“It's ridiculous, I'm aware,” Laurent said, and they both gave a small laugh.</p><p>“Uncle!”</p><p>Laurent's smile widened when he saw his oldest nephew running towards them. He went down on one knee, bracing himself as his nephew flew into his arms.</p><p>“We brought you some sweetmeats,” his nephew said, smiling up at Laurent.</p><p>“Oh? Shall we try to get away with eating some before breakfast?”</p><p>“I heard that,” said Auguste, walking over with the other boy in his arms.</p><p>“Come, children,” the Queen said, taking her son from Auguste.</p><p>Laurent kissed the top of his nephew's head, standing up to do the same to the other. He watched the three of them walk into the palace, the guards not far behind.</p><p>“A herald showed up late last night,” Auguste said, coming to stand next to Laurent. “It seems the Akielon delegation is expected to arrive this afternoon.”</p><p>“And the Patrans?”</p><p>“Last I heard, two days from now.”</p><p>Laurent hummed. “What a busy week we have ahead of us,” he said, knowing he would be socially drained by the end of it. His eyes focused on the fountain in the middle of the courtyard. “I think I'll go for a ride.” He called for a passing servant to give instructions for his horse to be readied.</p><p>“Right now?” said Auguste.</p><p>“I'll try to be back before breakfast,” Laurent said. He signaled for Lazar and Orlant to follow him as he walked out of the courtyard, making his way towards the stables.</p><p>They kept to the outskirts of the city, sometimes passing a small village every now and then. Laurent's stomach rumbled, and he was reminded of the fact that he had not eaten for almost a whole day. He took one hand off the reins and pressed it flat against his stomach with a grimace.</p><p>“We'll be stopping at the next inn,” said Laurent, grabbing the reins again. He knew that one would be coming up shortly if they stayed on the same dirt path.</p><p>They eventually reached the inn, approximately an hour away from the palace, and Laurent's eyes widened at what he saw.</p><p>Akielon banners.</p><p>“Your Highness?” Orlant sounded concerned when Laurent hastily swung down from his horse.</p><p>Was Damen…</p><p>“Wait out here,” Laurent said, quickly looping the reins over a wooden post. He ignored the murmurs and the eyes on him as he made his way to the door. He pushed it open, his heart racing.</p><p>Conversations died down all around the inn when he entered. Nobody, obviously, had expected to see the Prince of Vere in some small inn so far away from the palace.</p><p>Damen stood up from one of the long tables, a bright smile on his face when he saw Laurent.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Chapter 6</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Here we go :')</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Laurent had joined Damen at the end of the table, sitting beside him on the bench. Lazar and Orlant were mingling with the Akielons at another table, because Laurent did not want them to actually wait outside. His guards deserved a break, too.</p><p>“What are you doing all the way out here?” Damen still had that same smile on his face.</p><p>Laurent was thankful that they were close to the fireplace, because he could use that as the reason why his cheeks had a faint flush to them.</p><p>Forcing himself to not stare endlessly at the dimple on Damen's cheek, Laurent said, “Just out for a ride.” He cut into the meat on his plate. “Although, admittedly, I didn't expect to come this far.” He lifted the fork to his mouth and took a bite.</p><p>Damen seemed content with the answer. He brought a cup filled with wine to his lips, pausing when he turned his head slightly to look at Laurent.</p><p>Pretending not to notice the stare, Laurent carefully set down the utensils and picked up a napkin to wipe his mouth. He was suddenly aware of just how close they were sitting, their thighs practically touching.</p><p>“I've missed you,” said Damen, his voice low, before he finally took a sip.</p><p>Laurent could feel how much warmer his cheeks had gotten. He set down the napkin onto the now empty plate and took a big sip of water. When he lowered the cup, he had a small smile as he said, “Yeah. I've missed you too.” His voice as also low.</p><p>Ahead of them was a staircase, where a man was descending the steps. When he spotted them at the table, he pinched the bridge of his nose before walking over. He stood at the other side of the table in front of them.</p><p>“Really, Damianos?” the man said, looking unimpressed. His eyes flickered from Laurent's earring to Damen.</p><p>Oh.</p><p>He thought that Laurent was a pet.</p><p>Damen had been in the middle of taking another sip. He must have also realised what the man was implying, because he choked on the wine, coughing as he clumsily placed the cup back on the table.</p><p>There was an amused smile on Laurent's face as he patted Damen's back. He didn't think he was actually helping, but how could he waste any opportunity to touch Damen? His hand lingered for a little longer than necessary before he removed it.</p><p>“Wait, no–  He's not–” Damen eventually got his coughing fit under control. “This is Prince Laurent.”</p><p>“Pleasure to meet you…” Laurent made a gesture with his hand for the man to continue.</p><p>“Nikandros.”</p><p>Laurent instantly recognised the name. “The Kyros of Ios.” It was more of a statement than a question.</p><p>“Forgive me for the misunderstanding,” Nikandros said as he awkwardly bowed. “I was not aware you would be in attendance here.” He straightened his posture.</p><p>“Simply a mere coincidence,” said Laurent, “that I would run into the Akielon delegation here.” He stood up, straightening out the wrinkles from his jacket. “I should be heading back now.”</p><p>“I'll see you out,” Damen said, also standing up.</p><p>Laurent politely said his goodbyes before calling for Lazar and Orlant. They exited the inn, and Laurent began to unloop the reins from the post while Damen leaned against the brick wall near him. When he looked up, reins now in one hand, he caught Damen staring at his mouth. Laurent fought the urge to close the small gap between them to kiss him.</p><p>“The Queen of Akielos is not here?”</p><p>“No,” said Damen, crossing his arms across his chest. “The twins are still too young to travel, so Jokaste wanted to stay behind and be with them.”</p><p>Laurent nodded and looked off to the side, at nothing in particular. He idly wrapped the reins around his index finger as he stood there, thinking.</p><p>“Come with me to the indoor training arena one hour after dinner tonight,” Laurent finally said, in Akielon, as he looked back at Damen. His guards were the only people close enough to hear them, but they did not understand the language.</p><p>Damen had a look of curiosity on his face.</p><p>“Nobody ever goes there at that time.” Laurent mounted his horse and looked down at Damen. “If anybody questions you about it, you’re giving me private lessons in Akielon swordplay.”</p><p>“You're planning something,” said Damen, his smile wide as he lifted a hand to give a wave.</p><p>“Am I? We'll have to wait and see,” said Laurent. He wondered if he would ever be capable of smiling genuinely like that once he was a married man.</p><p>Damen lowered his hand. “Why don't you wait and come with us to Arles? Since we're both going there anyway.”</p><p>“Auguste will send half the guards out to search for me if I take that long to return.” Laurent had said it as a joke, but he would not be surprised if his brother did actually do that. He gave a small wave of his own and turned his horse around, setting off at a trotting pace along the dirt path away from the inn.</p><p>-</p><p>The Akielon delegation arrived midafternoon.</p><p>After dinner that night, Laurent thought that time was passing incredibly too slowly. People were already starting to retire, some with a pet on their arm. Auguste had gone out to the balcony with Torveld and Nikandros.</p><p>Laurent stayed in the dining hall with Damen, the two of them sitting across from each other. The Queen was lounging on a settee that was placed against the wall, near the doors that lead to the balcony. Her hand was running through her pet's long hair, who was seated beside her.</p><p>Laurent never failed to notice every time Damen's eyes were drawn to the sight.</p><p>“You're staring,” Laurent said, flatly.</p><p>Damen had a sheepish smile as he looked away, picking up his goblet. He brought it halfway to his mouth, stopped. “I haven't ever seen you drink wine.”</p><p>“I never developed a taste for it,” Laurent said. Which was unfortunate, because getting through the wedding day would be a lot easier if he were drunk.</p><p>They sat there for a little longer, making small talk until Laurent decided that it was finally time to leave. They said their goodbyes, then went to the training arena. They stood in the middle of the open space, facing each other.</p><p>“You know,” Damen said, “I could actually teach you some techniques–” Laurent pulled him down for a hungry kiss, their eyes locked on one another. Damen smiled into the kiss, his hand coming to rest on Laurent's lower back. When they pulled away for air, he said, “I like your idea more.”</p><p>“I wanted to do that since the inn,” said Laurent, a little breathless.</p><p>“Really? I wanted to do it when I first met you.”</p><p>Laurent rested his forehead against Damen's chest, his shoulders shaking as he laughed.</p><p>“I love the sound of your laughter.” After a moment, he said, “I read your book, by the way.” He pulled Laurent closer. “It's definitely… different than what I usually read.”</p><p>“You can just say you didn't like it,” Laurent said, laughing again as he pulled away enough to look up at Damen.</p><p>It was Damen's turn to laugh. “I'm sure my children will appreciate it more. It'll be the first Veretian book they learn to read.” He cupped the side of Laurent's head with his other hand. “Did you enjoy the poems?”</p><p>Laurent flushed, thinking about how he had fallen asleep beside the book the previous night. “I suppose.”</p><p>Damen grinned, bringing their faces closer to kiss. Laurent was helpless against the moaning noise he made. He lifted his hands up and began working on unlacing his jacket. After all, if they really were using swords like everyone thought they were, he wouldn't be expected to wear it.</p><p>Damen made an appreciative sound when Laurent dropped the garment to the floor, his eyes roaming the newly exposed skin of Laurent's neck. He dipped his head low, kissing down the white column of it.</p><p>Laurent gasped, his hands coming to rest on Damen's shoulders. “Don't leave a mark.” He had said it not unkindly, but he was serious.</p><p>Humming, Damen ran both hands down Laurent's sides. He slipped them under the hemline of Laurent's shirt and slid them up, excruciatingly slowly. He lifted his head from Laurent's neck to kiss him on the mouth, his hands still moving.</p><p>Laurent wished that this moment would last forever. If time were to suddenly freeze, at least they would always be together, like this.</p><p>-</p><p>Laurent met King Torgeir for the first time when the Patran delegation arrived the next day. Torveld had been all smiles as he introduced the two to each other. Laurent's fingers were wrapped around Torveld’s bicep, somehow managing a polite smile as he greeted the Patran King.</p><p>Torgeir was… hard to read. His expression did not give much away about what he was thinking, even as his eyes passed over Laurent. There was not even a hint of a smile. If it weren't for their similarities in looks, Laurent would not have guessed that Torgeir and Torveld were related.</p><p>Once all of the formalities were done with, Torveld kissed the knuckles on Laurent's hand before heading into the palace with his brother.</p><p>Laurent and Damen continued to see each other in the training arena every night. Damen would sometimes use his mouth on Laurent, but mostly, they kept to kissing and touching. He had even let Damen show him basic sword moves, since it'd look odd for him to not know anything, after all these days.</p><p>And then it was the night before the wedding, and Laurent wanted more.</p><p>So much more.</p><p>The two of them stood in the middle of the training arena, starting off with small, sweet kisses.</p><p>Laurent blinked dumbly when he felt Damen lift his hand up and to the side, the other resting against Laurent's back. Then he realised what was happening, and he lifted his free hand to Damen's shoulder, letting himself be lead as they slowly danced. Laurent turned his head to look at their joined hands, his heart pounding as they continued moving.</p><p>Looking back up at Damen with a smile, Laurent said, “This isn't exactly what I thought we'd be doing when we came here tonight.”</p><p>“You're quite good at it, though.” Damen stepped to the left, pivoting their bodies as he did.</p><p>“Surprisingly, so are you.”</p><p>Damen laughed and kissed the top of Laurent's head.</p><p>They both fell into comfortable silence, their movements gradually becoming slower after a few minutes. When they came to a complete stop, they remained like that, still holding each other.</p><p>Laurent was the first to pull away. He walked towards the long bench that lined one wall and kneeled at the left end of it. Brushing away the sawdust, be picked up the vial of oil that he had buried underneath it as Damen walked over to him.</p><p>Damen eyed it as he said, “When did you–”</p><p>“It doesn't matter.” Laurent pushed the vial into Damen's hands as he leaned up for a kiss, pleased when Damen deepened it.</p><p>“Have you ever…?”</p><p>“No.” Laurent could feel the flush on his face. “I want you to be my first.”</p><p>Laurent knew how foolish it was, to let himself feel this kind of happiness.</p><p>He knew, even as Damen made the first push into him, that they could never truly be together.</p><p>He knew, as his hands balled into fists against the wall, just how selfish he was being for wanting this.</p><p>He knew, as the first tear slipped down his flushed cheek, that war would be inevitable if they were ever caught. That the risk of that happening was not worth what they were doing.</p><p>How could something be so wrong, but feel so right, at the same time?</p><p>Why did being happy have to hurt so much?</p><p>-</p><p>Laurent's wedding attire was elegant, consisting of matching and well fitted white pants and a jacket, both of which were embroidered with gold. His boots were knee length. He also wore a blue shoulder cape, which Auguste had worn at his own wedding, and their late father at his. It would also be worn by Auguste's son, when the time came for him to marry Damen's daughter.</p><p>Torveld's clothing was similar, except that they were cut into a more traditional Patran style.</p><p>Laurent's eyes roamed the crowd, and he could not believe how many people were there to celebrate a wedding he did not want from the beginning. He saw Damen, and felt like his fake smile had turned genuine for one split moment before Torveld's fingers were on his chin. He let his head be turned so that they were facing each other again.</p><p>And then he felt the press of Torveld's lips against his, heard the clapping from the crowd.</p><p>That was it.</p><p>They were officially married.</p><p>The kiss went on longer than it should, leaving Laurent out of breath by the time it ended. Torveld chuckled, brushing the back of his fingers along Laurent's cheek before offering his arm. Laurent accepted it, placing a hand in the crook of it. He felt his heart sink when he noticed Damen had already left.</p><p>Extra tables had to be set up in the great dining hall to accommodate the number of people. A dais had been raised at one end of the room with a long table across it that overlooked the rest of the room. It was where Laurent and Torveld sat, accepting congratulations and gifts before the feast started.</p><p>The sound of music and chatter filled the room. Laurent was only half paying attention to what Torveld was telling him, nodding along every so often. His eyes were on Damen, who was in the middle of a conversation with Nikandros. When Damen noticed the stare, he waved at him with a small smile. Laurent's heart ached as he returned the wave.</p><p>“Don't you think,” said Torveld, after some time, leaning close to Laurent, “we should retire? It's getting late, and we need to be up early tomorrow.”</p><p>Laurent knew that wasn't the real reason why. He managed a nod. As they both stood and stepped down the dais, Laurent wished he could glare at those who were whistling at them. Torveld laughed it off, his hand moving to the small of Laurent's back.</p><p>Laurent was quiet throughout the walk to his rooms. He was quiet as they undressed. He was quiet as they got into bed, with Laurent on his back and Torveld on top. He was quiet as he watched Torveld mindlessly move the Akielon book out of the way.</p><p>“Is this your first time?”</p><p>It wasn't. “Yes.”</p><p>Torveld's hum was low as he reached for one of the vials of oil that had been left for them by the servants. His other hand was on Laurent's waist, his thumb moving in small circles against the skin there.</p><p>
  <em>You can tell him to stop.</em>
</p><p>The first finger.</p><p>
  <em>No, you can't.</em>
</p><p>The second.</p><p>
  <em>This is your duty.</em>
</p><p>The third.</p><p>
  <em>You were born for this.</em>
</p><p>Their marriage was consummated.</p><p>-</p><p>Laurent was not used to waking up beside another person in bed. It had startled him, at first, until the events of the previous night came back to him. They were on their sides, facing each other. Torveld was still asleep. Laurent stared at him, his fist clenching the bedding before he closed his eyes again.</p><p>He must have fallen back asleep at some point, because when he opened his eyes again, he was alone.</p><p>Slipping out of bed, he got dressed for the day. He took his time pouring himself a cup of water, setting it atop his desk as he sat at it to write. He folded the paper when he was done, sealing it with wax before putting it away in his pocket.</p><p>He stood. On his way out of the room, he asked a servant for the Akielon book to also be packed with his belongings.</p><p>Laurent knew it would be hard to say his goodbyes, but he still was not prepared once the time came to do it. He hugged Auguste as though his life depended on it.</p><p>“If I find out you've been eating too many sweetmeats,” Auguste said, pulling Laurent impossibly closer, “I'll personally come to Bazal, just to scold you.”</p><p>Laurent laughed, although it quickly turned into a sob. When they pulled away to look at each other, Auguste used his thumbs to wipe away Laurent's tears. Seeing the tears in his brother's eyes only made Laurent cry more.</p><p>Laurent finished the rest of his goodbyes, attempting his best smile when he explained to his nephews that he would return to visit every chance he had.</p><p>They all descended the stairs of the palace, Auguste and his wife each holding one of their sons. Damen was already at the bottom, and Laurent pulled out the paper as he reached the last few steps.</p><p>Damen looked at it, then at Laurent as he accepted it. “Safe travels.”</p><p>Laurent nodded. “And you.”</p><p>They both had a bittersweet smile.</p><p>The white mare that Torveld had gifted him months ago was already saddled and waiting for him. The Patran delegation was ready to leave. Torveld and Torgeir were talking to each other atop their own horses. Laurent greeted them before mounting his horse.</p><p>Whenever Damen decided to open the letter, he would read:</p><p>
  <em>We cannot continue this. I'm sure you understand why.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Perhaps, in another life, there will be no reason to hide my love for you.</em>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>If you made it this far, thank you so much for reading!</p><p>You can find me over on <a href="https://veretianstarburst.tumblr.com/">tumblr</a>!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
</body>
</html>